I note that Air Canada now proposes to actually look after people when the airline can’t deliver the service it’s committed to providing. If they’re willing to pay extra, of course.

Travellers grounded by flight delays are now able to call a dedicated Air Canada customer service line to air their complaints and find lodging — if they have paid an advance fee, the Montreal-based carrier said Wednesday.

Priced at $25 and $35 for short- and long-haul flights, the On My Way service provides waylaid travellers with access to customer service representatives who will help arrange for complimentary hotel accommodations, car rentals and complimentary meals. The service, which must be ordered when tickets are first purchased, also provides for the rebooking of flights.

The logic is inescapable in a world which has accepted the premise that I have to pay for the privilege of accessing the money I have entrusted to a bank that’s making obscene profits. Or the notion that I should pay to attend a “home show” where vendors try to sell me stuff. It’s only sensible that I should have to pay extra for decent service from an airline.

Air Canada cheerily assures us that “Call-centre assistance for travellers will still be available for consumers who opt out of the new Air Canada program.”

I’m sure. Indeed. I can just hear the recorded message now:

“Greetings from Air Canada. You’ve reached our budget line for traveller’s assistance. Your call is very important to us, although not as important as the calls we receive from the more sophisticated travellers who wisely purchased our insurance package. Please stay on the line until we’ve dealt with them. You should also be aware that the information we provide will only be 80% accurate, as opposed to the 100% accuracy rate of our special $25.00 service. Please also note that we are somewhat less polite, you stupid, cheap fuck.”