If You Can’t Beat’em…
Join them, of course.
In the interest of fairness, I’m prepared to put my doubts about “Neocon American Trolls Muslims Against Sharia” on hold.
Now, I personally think that many aspects of Islam as described in the Qur’an, the Sunna, and classical fiqh are out of touch with modernity. Like the Old Testament (which condones slavery, extermination of enemies of Israel, stoning, and other unpleasant practices) and the Hindu caste system (still very much part of the culture of millions), there are aspects of traditional Islam that no longer reflect the world we live in.
The thing about religion, though, is that most adherents think their holy teachings were either dictated or inspired by God, which makes one undertstandably a bit hesitant about editing them. When the divine teachings get too embarassingly out of touch with reality, the faithful have adopted various strategies.
- They can simply ignore them.
- They can announce that the teaching wasn’t really from God, but from someone else who snuck it in.
- They can announce that it’s actually methaphorical, or allegorical, or anagogical, and not meant to be for real.
- They can announce that it’s been “misinterpreted”.
Or, of course, like Islamists, the Hindu BJP or the Reverend Phelps, they can just go ahead and continue to live in the caves.
But Muslims Against Sharia is cutting right to the chase. They’re inviting the world to edit the Koran to remove anything that anyone finds offensive. Anyone at all. You don’t have to be a scholar or a cleric. Heck, as far as I can tell, you don’t even have to be Muslim to help edit the sacred texts. Just jump in and start chopping.
Well, that makes perfect sense to me. Others might think it a clumsy, obvious, theatrical attempt to troll up a bit of cheap controversy (you know, an Ezra kinda stunt): but I personally can’t imagine anybody getting annoyed at the notion of anonymous bloggers mutilating the words of their God. Yeah, that’ll work.
But I’d like to contribute more than just my editing expertise. I’d like to join this wonderful organization and find out a bit more about who they are, and really assist them in the job of helping bridge the gaps that separate us.
And as it happens, I have two Muslim friends who are interested too. One holds a doctorate in biology and is a senior manager at Health Canada. The other is a practicing nurse, a lifelong Ismaili, and a long standing volunteer with the Aga Khan institute. We discussed this whole episode last night, and all three of us are very interested in becoming members of “Muslims Against Sharia”.
I have requested membership information on the MAS website on behalf of all three of us, and I will keep you all apprised of our progress. Meanwhile, you might want to request membership information on your own behalf.
After all, this is an organization that’s willing to take your money (without being too clear about what they want to use it for) – I’m sure they’ll be equally appreciative of your volunteer commitment.
Let me know how YOUR membership application goes.
UPDATE 1:
Hmm. They have comment moderation on at their site, and my request for membership information hasn’t made it through yet. I’ll keep you posted. By the way, MAS, if you’re reading this, you could just reply here. What are your membership requirements and criteria, and how does one join?
UPDATE 2:
They’ve responded on their site with the following:
If you are a Muslim who supports our goals, please send your request to mash5@reformislam.org for further instructions. If you are not a Muslim, but would like to help us, you can become our blog contributor. Please send an email to info@reformislam.org and put “BLOG ACCESS” in the subject
Excellent. I shall request blog access immediately (since I’m definitely against violence and terrorism and all that bad stuff), and I shall pass along the membership information to my Muslim friends. Anyone want to join me in requesting Blog Access?
I’ve been thinking about this rewriting of the Qur’an and have come to the conclusion that it’s a wonderful idea that should be extended to other religious texts, like the bible for instance.
Critical review by those without an emotional stake in the process (that being a group of non-Christians) would, I have no doubt, only benefit future generations don’t you think?
Lets start with Matthew 5:28
My suggestion would be
But I say unto you that whosoever looketh on a woman to lust after her
hath committed adultery with her already in his heartis probably a normal guy, and verily I say unto you, dirty thoughts alone will not result in your eternal damnation in the fiery pits of hell.In our next discussion we’ll work on the definition of adultery.
Me, I’d start by cutting out 2 Kings 2, 23, where a bunch of little kids laugh at Ezekiel, calling him “bald head); and to teach the naughty kids a lesson, God sends two she-bears to rend forty two children into bloody bits. Now, I’m all for discipline, anhd God knows kids can be annoying, but that, to me, has always had the wrong kind of optics.
But you raise an interesting point, Brother Stageleft. If our friends at MAS think its cool to REMOVE material from the Koran (and presumably everyone else’s sacred scriptures), is it fair ball to start ADDING stuff too? Stuff Allah, or Jehovah, or Krishna WOULD have said if they had just had a bit more time?
I say we put back the books of the Bible that the grayheads chose to leave out, too.
I love the idea of adding stuff. I think WHAT TO EXPECT WHEN YOU’RE EXPECTING should be appended to both the Bible and the Koran, and why not the Torah too?
The Book of Revelation. Almost didn’t make the cut at the council that first set up the Bible. And I think that my religion could be substantially improved if we just kicked the that book to the curb.
Okay, Revelations is Out. What are you willing to pay us to slip in a chapter of “Fathom Five” to replace it?
We can replace Genesis with The Origin of Species. Anyone opposed?
Seconded.
Actually, if you are looking for alternatives to “Revelation”, might I suggest my wife’s book of ecclesiastical poetry, “Seal up the Thunder”.
http://vividpieces.net/seal_up_the_thunder.shtml
“They’re inviting the world to edit the Koran to remove anything that anyone finds offensive.”
That is quite a misstatement. We believe that God is infallible and good. If two verses in the Koran contradict each other, at lest one of them did not come from God. When one of them says that human life is precious and the other says ‘kill them [infidels] wherever you find them” it’s not hard to figure out which one did not come from God.
PS
Still waiting for that blog access request.
Is it? Gosh, here’s exactly what you said – to the world at large, as far as I can tell:
So the “misstatement” bit would be…?
As for the blog access request…actually, in terms of drawing attention to your actual structure, membership and intent, I don’t think that will be necessary. But thanks, it’s good to know that remains an option.
We ask readers to point out verses that “promote violence, divisiveness, religious or gender superiority, bigotry, or discrimination,” which means that they could not have come from God, because the Koran speaks against those concepts and God cannot contradict himself. You should stop making assumptions when you have access to facts.
I’m sorry…you’ve failed to point out my “misstatement” again. Care to try once more?
Balbulican said
“Excellent. I shall request blog access immediately (since I’m definitely against violence and terrorism and all that bad stuff), and I shall pass along the membership information to my Muslim friends.”
Why don’t you just do what you said you wanted to do?
They seem quite willing to accommodate both you and your friends.
I did pass along the information to my friends, who are both amused and appalled by this little neocon blogger charade (they’re not quite as used to URQ blog-games and online Muslim hate as I am). Semir was initial interested in the notion of a Muslim organization trying to reform Islam: he was quickly disabused of that notion.
I may indeed request blog access when these current exchanges run their course. All options are open.