Order Now and Get Ginsu Knives, Chuck Norris Edition!
Running out of Christmas gift ideas for that hard-to-please cousin from Alberta? Apart from the danger of either ripping your leg open or blowing your head off on your way to that three a.m. piss, this looks like a great deal.
OMG – “Many customers are buying one for both sides of the bed”
Too funny. Hopefully none of their customers are prone to sleep walking.
“Many customers are buying one for both sides of the bed”.â€
Well, of course, Tree. You wouldn’t want HER to have access to her bedside shotgun, and not you, right?
Please tell this is a joke, please!
http://the-backup.com/
OH MY GOD, it is for real. Just in time for the War on Christmas.
America has a sickness. I’d photoshop this, but I can’t think of way making any more funny and pathetic than it already is. Unsecured, load fire arms in the bedroom,… hey what could possibly go wrong here?
Oh, no…this is for real.
From their website:
OVER 100 MILLION AMERICAN HOMES HAVE SHOTGUNS
THE FASTEST GROWING SEGMENT OF THE SHOTGUN INDUSTRY IS THE SHORT BARREL HOME PROTECTION SHOTGUNS.
WHERE ARE PEOPLE STORING THEM FOR EASY ACCESS???
MOST PEOPLE USING A SHOTGUN FOR HOME PROTECTION KEEP THE GUN IN THE CORNER OF THE BEDROOM OR UNDER THE BED. IT TAKES AT LEAST 12 SECONDS TO GET GUN FROM THE CORNER AND TURN FOR A SHOT. IT ALSO MAKES YOU TURN YOUR BACK TO THE PERPETRATOR.
GETTING YOUR WEAPON FROM UNDER THE BED CAN TAKE MINUTES. THE BACK UP CAN GIVE ,YOU, THE HOMEOWNER ACCESS TO YOUR SHOTGUN IN TWO SECONDS. YOU CAN DO THIS WHILE IN THE LYING POSITION ON THE BED.
WITH A SHOTGUN YOU DON’T NEED TO BE A GOOD AIM! THE SPRAY CAN BE 6 TO 8 INCHES WIDE.
WHEN BEING AWAKEN SUDDENLY, YOU HAVE NO CHANCE OF GETTING TO YOUR GUN IN TIME WITH-OUT THE BACKUP.
BACK-UP IS NOT INTENDED FOR USE IN HOMES WITH CHILDREN
WE HAVE NO POSITION AS TO WHETHER THE GUN IN THE RACK SHOULD BE LOADED OR NOT. WE EXPECT THAT EACH GUN OWNER WILL ACT IN A RESPONSIBLE MANNER.
WE BELIEVE IN 2ND AMENDMENT: WE THE AMERICAN PEOPLE RETAIN THE RIGHT TO KEEP AND BEAR ARMS. AND WE THINK IT SHOULD FURTHER SAY THAT THOSE ARMS SHOULD BE ACCESSIBLE IN TIME OF NEED.
STATISTICS SUGGEST THAT 100 MILLION AMERICAN HOUSEHOLDS HAVE SHOTGUNS FOR HOME PROTECTION. NO ONE WITHOUT THE BACK-UP DEVICE HAS GOOD ACCESS TO THEIR GUN.
THE BACK UP IS HIDDEN AWAY DURING THE BY MAKING THE BED OR COVERING WITH SHEETS AND BLANKETS
$39.95 IS A SMALL PRICE TO PAY FOR ACCESS TO A GUN THAT COST FROM SEVERAL HUNDRED TO SEVERAL THOUSAND DOLLARS.
THERE IS $9.95 SHIPPING AND HANDLING CHARGE IN THE CONTINENTAL UNITED STATES.
I tried the “back up” but it gets tangled in the bedding. I still think the “bolt upright” model that mounts to my left hand bedpost is the best on the market. I was able to blow a hole in my bedroom door in under 6 seconds from a deep sleep with that puppy.
So did you Dick Cheney the Puppy Doug?
I’d say it’s about time.
Like the website says, it can take up tp 12 SECONDS to get to the corner, turn, and fire a shot! Everyone knows that getting a shotgun out from under the ebd can take minutes! MINUTES!
What a great product. I mean, just when I thought advertising companies were running out of ideas on exploiting the growing paranoia in the U.S., they come out with this!
I like the “We have no position as to whether or not….”
Zorpheus
Not sure what you mean. Why would I shoot a puppy?
I usually shoot high at the bedroom door just in case it’s the kids fooling around. I figure no one under 5 foot is going to do me much harm and a head full of buckshot is the surest way to deter a felon if that’s what you mean by the Dick Cheney reference.
Since, according to Harper & Co., crime has become such a huge problem in Canada, perhaps the Cons could include a tax break for these in their ominbus crime bill.
Hey Doug, I’m only 5′2″, and I could get into your house and photoshop your arse
, best aim a little lower, LOL.
As for the puupy, I thought you were shooting at it, thus the Dick Cheney remark
Glad to here you puppy is safe and I hope your kids don’t grow to tall, LOL.
I will have my guns, but that’s too much even for me. It just doesn’t seem quite safe, although if the safety was on, and as we do, there wasn’t a round chambered, it would probably be okay. But, I could see it tearing up the sheets. Or the holder tearing up or scratching up the gun. I could go for Doug’s bedpost thing. Right now, mine’s propped up in the corner, about 3′ from the bed.
The Moment I Realized I’d Left Reality and Was Now a Resident of Cloudcookooland VIII
Wild Monkey Attacks “So I was sorry to hear about the death of New Delhi’s deputy mayor. How did he die?” “Wild monkey attack.” (blink!) “No, really, how did he die?” “I told you, wild monkey attack.̶…
But Karen, like the add says, it could take 12 seconds to reach the corner!
I’ll chance it.
$39 plastic shotgun holder likely made in China for 39 cents a unit. You’re all just jealous you didn’t think of this first, and it should be even more obvious for the left given their propensity to associate Americans with gun-wielding mayhem.
Michael Moore has led you all in the right direction, all you have to do is cash in. Think guns + American people and the product should literally fall into your lap. Perhaps a shotgun accessory for your Ford F350?
OK, I waited a whole day……
Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird, it’s true, not only that but Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
When Chuck Norris falls in the water he doesn’t get wet, the water gets Chuck Norris’ed
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
I thought I’d heard them all, but that one takes the cake. That was funny.
Do you have any clue how hard it is to get gunpowder residue off the sheets? Christ.
Makes the excitement of the kids jumping to wake you up at 4:00am Christmas morning a little more life-threateningly fun.
Thanks for bringing that fine product to my attention. I’m getting a matched set for each bedroom…it will be cheaper than those Blackwater Security guards I’ve been using.