My 12-yr-old declared herself a nation today when I refused to subsidize the $56/month-for-24-months purchase of a pug puppy at the pet store tonight. HER nation allows for multiple dogs (assuming that the country/family her nation resides within cleans up the mess in the back yard AND pays for the food that results in said mess) and a cat with … shall we say a sensitive bowel and leave it at that? (and yes, the country/family within which the 12-yr-old resides is responsible for cleaning up after the princess cat, as well as providing the “tuna only” food and “sensitive tummy” food for the princess cat) and the guinea-pig-that-will-not-die and all the attendant messes & foodstuffs required by said guinea pig.

The 12-yr-old’s nation would be “satisfied” with another dog.

I (more or less) tactfully suggested that since the 12-yr-old nation has dual citizenship, she might check with the father-country/family to see if the latest “need” could be met.

The 12-yr-old nation is now barricaded at the end of the hall and refusing to participate in negotations until (a) the mother country capitulates or (b) it’s time to leave for school.

This internal diplomacy stuff is hard work. Where’s the merlot?

Crow will have to answer for himself Throbbin, as for Stageleft:.The Nation, of course we are distinct, we always have been, since day one.

Candace: Internal diplomacy is tough, friend Crow has decided that his nation will be governed by a parliamentary democracy much like the regime currently lording over us one we have now - since there is only one person in his nation just now he’s having a bit of trouble being his own opposition but I’m sure he’ll work it out. Until he does I have to confess that the muttering coming from his side of the office is quite entertaining.

I am also having some difficulties of my own, as you will soon see, personal ambition in the bunker ranks, internal extra-national relations, technology negotiations, Stephen Harper not returning my calls or answering our emails…. the life of a benevolent dictator is tougher than I thought.

balbulican: Stageleft:.The Nation^TM is a benevolent dictatorship, a secular benevolent dictatorship, people will keep their spiritual activities in their homes and in their places of worship, as is befitting a secular nation. Although we are a dictatorship we will not foist our definition of critical thinking upon the masses, it is their job to figure that sort of thing out on their own, there will be no state nannyism of any type in Stageleft:.The Nation.

Look b, we all knew it was gonna come to this at some point, we’ve even discussed it at length, and you had no problems with it. A stageleft benevolent dictatorship was bound to come into being, the writing has been on the wall for years, and, well, a dictatorship being what it is, there’s the benevolent dictator, and then there is everybody else, you are a strong advocate of the revolution, you always have been, and a trusted advisor, please, lets leave it there. There are also other internal nation-to-nation issues that have arisen, more on that below.

As for the lighting issues you bring up it was a matter of intense negotiation, you will note that there is a mass of technology on the Stageleft side of the DMZ - friend Crow is an artist and needs good light to work, Stageleft:.The Nation is more concerned with achieving benevolent world domination; good lighting might help that along somewhat, but think of the propaganda machinery under that table.

For the first few minutes of our existence internal nation-to-nation relations were very good, until I mentioned to friend Crow that you were interested in a Ministry position. This concerned him greatly as he said that would immediately double the population of Stageleft:.The Nation resulting in a possible expansion into the DMZ to accommodate the growth this represented, and possibly threaten his national security.

Diplomacy did prevail however the not so thinly veiled Crovian “but I’ll be watching you” comment after the meeting led me to believe that there was espionage afoot so, as you have no doubt noticed, Stageleft:.The Nation has enlisted the aid of Darth Vader and Buddha to watch them from the safety of the DMZ.

Yours in the revolution

stageleft
Benevolent Dictator For Life

I am shocked - and, yes, appalled - at your suggestion that I somehow condone your presumptuous seizure of dictatorial powers. This was NOT what we all discussed during those long nights at the Jade Lily, or in the squat in Manchester, or in our camp in Bolivia.

I cannot accept this betrayal of our ideals and principles, this callous rejection of the egalitarian vision for which we have all fought so long and hard. That is, unless you agree to make me Minister for Spiritual Affairs and Critical Thought. In that case, I’ll be able to gag it down.

Otherwise, you will leave me no choice but to declare The Independent Republic of Balbulica, a Nation Within a Nation Within a Nation, its noble terrain stretching proud and free from the towering majesty of the workbench to the glittering glory of the second monitor.

The choice is yours.

What you need is the United Small-Self-Declared Nations speaker Arwen and her crack force of infant peacekeepers to provide much needed mediation. HOWEVER, I do STRONGLY note that your membership dues are not up to date.